Welcome to UnderCover Borderline.

Hello, and thanks for reading. You can call me Dee. I'm a young college woman with a lot on her plate, on top of BPD.
I don't go to therapy, or take medication. I would love to, I'm positive it would be ridiculously helpful. But I have yet to find a doctor who takes my insurance, is accepting new patients, and is willing to take a BPD client. So until my luck changes, or I'm convincing enough to get a doctor to take me, I suffer.
This blog is my life, as I perceive it.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

I'm not quite sure.

So someone got all pissy with me today as we were talking about fafsa. I tried to explain that his debt is NOT the reason he was denied, but because when he applied he was considered a dependent by the govt. He yells at me and hangs up. whatever. he's a perverted piece of shit anyway, I ignore it but maybe I shouldn't have.

Anywho::::

I've been going to the gym the past few days [since last weds, so almost a week.] I weighed myself on sunday, and I've lost 1.5lbs. I know that sounds like nothing, but it's a start.

What's more important on an excersize bike? the mph or the time spent? my friend did 50 mins [at about 7-8mph, starting at 1 resistance and getting up to 7 resistance [still in the 7mph area]
I did 30mins on the bike, going from 4-6 resistance, [upping every 10 mins] at about 12-13mph for the first 20mins, then 13-14mph for the last 10. She's lost more weight than I have and only been to the gym 1 extra day.but she's also been taking a multivitamin, and both fish and flaxseed oil. plus she's heavier than I am [by about 100lbs]

I don't hurt like I was when I started at the gym. [except for my ass, the bike seat is NOT comfy x.x ] which is a good sign. I'm sore, but I'm not like I have to go home and do nothing all night cause I feel like death lol

My next goal is the elliptical/stairmaster thingy. I don't have the rhythm for it yet, but another week or so I should be able to start using it.

I've been less depressed. but still sometimes I get really bad...

I'll write again later. sometime. maybe.
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1 comment:

  1. AnonymousJune 17, 2010 at 8:24 AM

    Hi there, 1.5 pounds certainly is a start! That's great. I think once you start losing, it helps to lose that 1 pound or 2 to keep you motivated.

    I understand the depression. It cycles with me so badly. Sometimes I think I'll drive myself insane worrying about how tomorrow will be because while I know I am okay right this immediate second, I don't know how I'll be this evening or in the morning when I wake up. It's scary sometimes.

    As for the mean guy from work -- pfft. There are so many idiots in the world today. I think there are times when they just decide to vent on someone innocent.

    Addy

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